Here we go again, tricked into thinking it is a New Year when there is absolutely nothing new about it. It is the same ole, same ole, Déjà vu all over again. The person who invented this “New Year" ought to be sued for defamation of characterization.

I suppose everybody has their own definition of “new,” but when I think of new I think of something that has not been before not the recycling is something old.

I have seen more New Years than I can remember and have concluded that it is a misnomer. The one thing I have observed through the years is that every New Year I get older. What is up with that? If I could stop the New Year, could I stop getting older? I would like to try at least!

If the New Year was actually new, I would get newer not older. This has brought me to a level of grumpiness that I’m not sure I can get over.

I do remember those times when I celebrated the New Year and it was all because I had no idea what was going on. Things were not getting new, rather they were getting old. Perhaps the newness of the New Year was just the first day of January. I can go along with that.

I have a few suggestions along this line. Instead of calling it the New Year why don’t we call it the old year all over again? That would make some sense to me. I do not mind doing things over again, but I do not want to be tricked into thinking that I am doing something new.

I have a little difference with the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage along this line.

I know she did not invent New Year’s resolutions, but she is the biggest proponent of this idea. She suggests I come up with a list of New Year’s resolutions and is quite insistent about it.

All through the year she will query me, “How are you doing with your New Year’s resolutions?”

“I’m still working on them,” I say to get away from that subject as quickly as possible. I am so grateful that she does not ask me which resolution I have completed because I cannot remember any of the New Year’s resolutions from the last year.

However, when you come to this aspect of the New Year’s resolution how many of those are actually new? In order to make peace with my wife, I always come up with a list of New Year’s resolutions, which if looked into would resemble almost identically last year’s New Year’s resolutions. This is where writing things down can be very detrimental to a good solid marriage.

I have memorized these New Year’s resolutions, or so I say. Actually, I have more to do with my memory than cluttering it up with a bunch of New Year’s resolutions.

Perhaps our politicians should pass some kind of a law saying that you cannot make a New Year’s resolution until the Old Year’s resolutions are fully fulfilled. That would make a lot more sense to me.

Another issue I have with this New Year montage has to do with birthdays. During this New Year, I will get one year older. I object to that most vigorously. I think that is very presumptuous of this New Year to insist I get older. If it were really a New Year it would do something to help me get newer and not older.

Getting older has become very monotonous to me. I know every birthday is new, but what overrides that is I am getting older on that birthday. I am very confused about all of this. How can a new birthday make you older? Something is wrong here somewhere.

I find myself at that stage in life where I am looking for my second childhood. But the New Year keeps insisting I keep getting older. How can I enjoy a second childhood when I have this aspect of getting older? If it is my birthday, I should be the one to determine if I am getting older or younger.

I do not want to shock anybody, but everything new is eventually getting old.

This came to me quite disappointingly when I recently put on my favorite necktie for church. My wife said, “Are you wearing that tie again? Don’t you think you ought to get a new tie?”

It was my favorite tie and now I am being told it is old and needs replacing. Which brings me to the disturbing question; does everything old need to be replaced?

If that is true, I am in serious trouble.

I guess I am at the stage of life where new is not very much of attraction to me. I like the old and I am not ashamed of it.

I can appreciate what the prophet Jeremiah said. “Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein” (Jeremiah 6:16).

Just because something is new does not mean it is better and just because something is old does not mean it needs to be replaced. In fact, our country needs to get back to those “old paths.